The entrepreneurs at eHarmony.com have finally been strong armed into submission by The Almighty (the Almighty State of New Jersey, that is). It turns out those “open minded,” happy go lucky “multiculturalists” who run New Jersey, The State, have made it oppressively clear just how far that ostensible open mindedness rhetoric goes, and even more clear just who is really in charge of eHarmony’s target market, expertise, and overall mission. 

In a spirited and invigorating exchange co-hosts of The BS Show®, Bjorn and Shawn, presume to advise eHarmony.com and its putative leader, Dr. Neil Clark Warren, how best not to back down to these punitive purveyors of postmodernity. Bjorn and Shawn also presume to directly question those totalitarian despots who have now bullied into position as eHarmony’s de facto boss. (By the way, if you doubt that your business is next please reexamine the tell-tale signs which lead up to Kristallnacht. Or simply default to a sheepishness as obtuse and inhumane as Sheryl Crow’s defense philosophy. Either way have a great show everyone — while it lasts.)

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In a bittersweet turn of events for the victorious senator, and now-President-elect Barack Obama, conservatives on this US election day eve began an en masse movement of suicide and emigration. Upon hearing the news that up to two thirds of 120 million US conservatives would not debase themselves by becoming subject to impending totalitarian PC demands for “unity” (i.e. forcible submission), leftist devotees in California interrupted incestuous celebrations with their media-elite cronies only long enough to chortle, “We guess that’ll mean fewer camps to build — fewer anti-progressives to re-educate, or punish to death in work camps for their horrible intolerance!”

When asked if there is room enough in the states for gulags which could accommodate the remaining 40 million conservatives, party leaders cavalierly asked how that figure was arrived at, and “What’s a gulag?”  

Despite myriad reports of innumerable depressed traditional families egressing the country’s porous-to-non-existent borders, or simply “offing” themselves with their soon-to-be-confiscated firearms, feverish celebrations of The One continued in anticipation of the night’s acceptance speeches from senior party leaders touting the party’s themes of New Tolerance and New Open Mindedness. 

Further inquiries as to who might actually now be counted on to procreate, or fight in the military, or hold down a job in this new incentive-challenged fiefdom, or even just make it out of the womb alive, were met with a slew of vulgar gestures, the question “What’s a fiefdom,” and a swelling din of voices singing “Ain’t no nannie like a nannie-state nannie ’cause a nannie-state nannie don’t stop.”

Don’t stop?!? almost rhymes with hemlock — on a night when a pox named Rampant Entitlement is fomenting many a terrible thirst.  

©2008 TheBSshow.com and The BS Show.

All rights reserved.

Examine The Nastiness And Constraints Of That Most Wonderfully Evolved Of All Races And Its Unrelenting Propensity For Dangerous Stampedes. On This Dec. 03, 2008 Unedited Porchcast Of The BS Show® With Bjorn And Shawn.

Many kinds of extremists are taken to task in this episode of the world’s number one porchcast sometimes called “The Anything Doesn’t Go Show” for good reason. All but the hardest of heart will again realize why that is so by watching this week’s near-Churchillian manifestation of The BS Show® with Bjorn And Shawn.

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Should a dirty nuke go off in Los Angeles and only one analysis about this weekend’s “thug throwing shoes at a sitting U.S. President” incident be recoverable in its aftermath, I hope for the sake of any good people who survive, that it will be this one. Consider its inescapable poignancy:

The infantile Arab extremist (and member of that exalted field of “objective” journalism) who deceitfully, and in quick succession, whipped two shoes at President Bush’s head in an otherwise civilized setting, can only be said to have logically been celebrating that very president! Here’s why: any of us able to look away from the nattering, often juvenile Circus News Network for five seconds (to engage our minds rather than surrender them) will notice that this maniacal Iraqi bully demonstrated to the utmost his newly provided privilege of being able to protest in the middle east (albeit, in that backwoods, ignoble, all-too-middle-eastern, gutter-level style) without fear of summary execution or beheading by the absolute, fascist iron hand wielded by one Saddam Hussein or the like. Amazing!!!

Not only had this misguided monkey of a shoe-throwing visigoth (and inadvertent celebrant of politcal freedom) previously avoided inclusion as politically incorrect carrion in one of Iraq’s myriad mass graves (discovered only during the “occupation”) but he was now proving his own ease of access to even the crudest form of dissent by physically attacking the very man who was key to furnishing that privilege in the first place. Wow! No wonder we at The BS Show® are not dopey enough to agree that “all cultures are equal.”

We are, however, dopey enough to ask all manner of apoplectic, lefty dunderheads — our friends included — to explain their way out of this, without hating us, without hating the conclusion of logic, and without resorting to vapid manipulations which so often leave extreme lefties (and, at times, maniacal righties) feeling good about fatuous talking points which further diminish (and endanger) humanity’s well being.

©2008 TheBSshow.com® and The BS Show®.  All rights reserved.

Should it turn out that financial guru Bernard Madoff is guilty of stealing upwards of $50,000,000,000 of his clients’ investments one can, in keeping with the en masse left-leaning, hyper-tolerant mania which is sweeping these United States these days, only hope (and keep a nice thought, too) that we’ll carefully mind ourselves as to the severity of our reaction as a nonjudgmental family of well-meaning beings.

Obviously, to many of us, education is “still the key” to, umm, blunting our wonderfully evolved race’s inclinations towards, umm, misunderstandings about one man’s mistaken misappropriations of the monetary assets of others, so it will remain especially important that our progress towards progressive values not be derailed by the inflexibility of old fashioned (think “right-wing, conservative”) moral expectations nor by the assuring but coercive rigidity of a so-called high standard of justice.

After all, hasn’t each of us woken up on the wrong side of the bed and needed a little extra tolerance for the disarming lack of balance which ensued? Isn’t it New York Times® columnist David Brooks who presumes to remind us how divisive it can be to rush, or even crawl, towards a black and white  assessment which might be perceived as not inclusive of others? 

Before any of us offends another’s inclusive sensibilities by acting bigoted (or acting at all close minded) towards a Bernard Madoff let us resolve to not become so partisan that Mr. Madoff is suddenly made to “feel like the other.” (Remember one present day “expert’s” lesson drawn from Kristallnacht?) Do we, as a beautiful gathering of tolerance-loving beings want to risk having those as erudite as David Brooks’ passel of colleagues at The New York Times® react by showing us that we are, in Brooks’ pejorative, “reactionary?” Chance forbid.

So this week when water cooler chit chat surrounding Bernie Madoff’s alleged faux pas takes a turn towards outdated, judgmental standards, and the quest for alleged moral clarity, which, taken together, might tempt you to abandon the enlightened warmth of everything “progressive” merely to join those hateful, ethics-touting control freaks who smugly offend others as if they have a duty to judge well, well, you and we at TheBSshow.com® can band together in protest. We can say, “Hey guys, isn’t this critique sort of inappropriate? Might not others feel offended by your bigotry towards Bernie at this sensitive time? Can’t you see how such hatefulness can be perceived as divisive. Can’t we all just come together?”

Yes! Yes, we can. Together, we can all work — oh, wait, now many of us will absolutely have to work because our $50 billion has been pilfered, but, leaving that aside, what was I saying? — oh, together we can progressively progress towards, umm, more togetherness, and finally learn that when we positively come together (or in this case work together) it’s not only easier to continue avoiding harsh judgments, it’s also easier to reach into others’ pockets, er, I mean, easier to share that enlightened open mindedness of the message of acceptance which feels stronger than fifty billion fallacious platitudes which, though vacuous at best, nevertheless help us to forget how ridiculously dangerous, wrong, and infantile our constant sidestepping of moral issues is. 

What’s the old bumper sticker slogan?  ”If you think morals education is expensive, try Bernie Madoff’s.”

©2008 TheBSshow.com and The BS Show With Bjorn And Shawn®. All rights reserved.

The BS Show is not responsible for any physical or ideological regurgitation on the reader’s part, temporary or otherwise, caused by the ruthless lucidity of holistically reasonable analysis put forth herein. The reader is advised that any acquisition of genuine wisdom will lead to a proportionately sharper mind, softer heart, and richer life, not to mention irreversible erosion of those myriad beliefs often founded on fundamentalist secular extremism (FSE) and the like, whether or not the reader’s indoctrination was administered by those in authority at universities or otherwise. In that regard the reader assumes all responsibility for the immeasurable risk(s) associated with finding the courage to question the presuppositions of those FSE teachings at the suggestion of The BS Show®.  :-)

Scornful Menaces Try To Bully Innocents For Public Display of Affection For The West

“There are going to be consequences” one militant gay extremist threatened this week in The L.A. Times.  ”You can expect to be publicly judged. Many can expect to pay a price for a long time to come” [for contributing financially to the preservation of traditional marriage]. Such is the vindictive prattling proffered by a living exemplar of today’s twisted “tolerance” stampede. 

Without stooping to the infantile and intolerant level of this bully (or his bigoted, theist-o-phobic confederates, two of whom purport to be reporters for The LA Times), our co-hosts, Bjorn and Shawn, analyze the underpinnings and ramifications of this most incendiary precinct of our raging culture war — a war which, of course, is often said not to exist. Duh.

It’s our Thanksgiving Eve 2008 porchcast replete with a challenging main discourse and all the trimmings one would expect of the yet-to-be-arrested Bjorn and Shawn and that little number we all like to call The BS Show.® Bon appetit!!!

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I just have to opine one more time in 2008:  While just now packing for vacation (a word which, itself, can be code for holiday; which, of course, means Holy day; which, in proximity to Christmas, might imply a specific Christian holy day. In fact, Christmas really means Christ Mass, which itself means Messiah Celebration, so, no wonder the anti-Christian bigots at large love to hate any mention of a Merry Christmas in the public square with that most mollifying contempt which can only be the work of good old evolved “humanity”) I over heard a few minutes of a Michael Medved interview (author of the new book The 10 Big Lies About America: Combating Destructive Distortions About Our Nation) poignantly summarizing several of those alleged lies. Wow!

I’m going to suggest that Medved’s book be required reading not only for the polymathic co-hosts of The BS Show® but for each and every caller and emailer contacting the world’s number one porchcast, The BS Show®. Incredible. 

I’ve gotta get back to packing but all manner of registered voters — especially those who boast of their open mindedness — are hereby implored to make The 10 Big Lies About America one of 12 books you’ll buy and read in 2009. If it turns out that those aforementioned open minds are imbued with a bit of humility and thirst for wisdom, to boot, Medved’s work just might serve to lighten the burden of some of your own baggage. Merry Christmas!!!